MEMORIES

Got to talk to my bestfriends (yup i have two!) and we began to reminisce of old memories like when we were in highschool and also in college. Making me realize how we've grown from being an innocent child to an intelligent women. Capable of being independent and making their own decisions. It's been a while since i last talked to them talking about old times like it was yesterday. I just can't believe we are adults but still in our hearts feeling young. Then i remembered how it used to be, back then all we ever care about was our studies and on the side are boylets. After talking for an hour and half with Mylene finally remembered the name of my crush back in college, his name was Rodney, i could still picture his face in my mind but taht was just it. Mylene was even asking me about the other crushes i've had and it just made me smile for back then i did some crazy stuffs with regards to my crushes. I've had my share of embarrassing moments with them... Then there was my group of friends who were also crazy everytime we were hanging out or having our group studies. How could i ever forget those memories it was such a wonderful time for me. Celeste even had to remind me of those freshman years having this guy who was just so annoying. Talking about our group of friends from highschool, we talked about Janice "JENNY" Oloresisimo... she died 8 years ago a train accident, i can't believe that it has been that long since then. I missed her badly and everytime i was in new york it reminds me of how she was when she was alive. She used to study in NYU and work at the same time. She was one of those people i considered my inspiration when it comes to dealing with life. Since she lived like a 40 years old when in fact she was just 20 years of age. How time flies so fast! Now we are young adults makinga life of our own. Having to deal with life's difficulties and learning from our own mistakes...

WELCOME TO MY WORLD

"Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived." William Parrish (Meet Joe Black)

What a nice way to start my post! As of today i went to work and got into thinking about certain things that i should do for my boyfriend. I don't know i feel that i should be able to express myself clearly with him though i do know that he knows how i really feel about him. It's a matter of me feeling secure about this relationship i have right now. I sound so serious, well i guess it all boils down to one thing and that is i am in love and i want to let the whole world to know about it. But it isn't simple everything is complicated with me maybe i still have my issues with rejections. I've been rejected so many times that i got so used to it . That when someone comes along and loves me for who or what i am i still fear that somehow i'll be rejected again. It all leads to poor self-esteem and maybe that's an issue i should be dealing with.

Don't i sound pathetic? i guess i have the other serious side of me worrying about the smallest things that sometimes i shouldn't be worried about. I know, i know it sounds so dumb but that's who i am.

A FRESH NEW START

So here i am still thinking for the nth time why i am creating my own blog... i guess i needed to share my thoughts meaning i am ready for people to get to know me and as well as for me to be able to express my thoughts. I was truly convinced by my bestfriend Mylene (though she does not know it yet...) that maybe it's time for me to express myself. I do feel that in doing this i am able to better understand myself and that i could just vent out some bottled up feelings that i've been hiding. Maybe i need some anger management as well or maybe through this blog i could be a better person knowing that i am but sometimes i'm not so sure of things. Some issues needs to be discussed. I am writing again and that's a good thing. It's a fresh new start of the year, wanting to share my thoughts and what has been going on with my life as well.