WEST SIDE STORY

We (my boyfriend ian and me) were on our way to returning the dvd/vcd's we borrowed from the video store when we saw this girl and she waved at him, when i looked at him he was waving back. I was about to ask him who she was but i had to get out of the car to return the dvd/vcds. When i came back to the car, i wanted to ask him who the girl was but as it turns out he was the one who brought it up. It was the ex-girlfriend... I didn't even recognize her for she looks so innocent. I just couldn't believe that it was her for i have never met her personally and i just know her through the pictures i saw in friendster, her personal profile and from my boyfriend's email address (she usually send tons of pictures of her). For an instance i didn't feel a pinch of anger towards her since the things she had done to my boyfriend maybe it was a blessing in disguise that i didn't know it was her waving at him. For just once i wasn't feeling angry at her maybe because i know deep down that I AM THE PRESENT and it's me that he's with. In the past whenever i know that he's been with her or even talked to her either thru chat or by phone it just makes me cringe in anger asking myself why he's still friends or why he's still in a relationship that's been failing. I guess that everything is sinking in now and i have a better understanding of everything.

So that's my west side story...

AFTER THE RAIN, WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

I often think of what happens after the rain comes pouring down, does it make everything clear like when things aren't going your way and all you have to do is cry it out or just simply have a long walk. Does everything comes back the way it used to be or simply a brand new solution reveals itself? Do you really think that things just makes everything clear just like a brand new day has come? After the lightning and thunderstorm, maybe a strong wind or a light rain, do you ever realize that everything changes?

Sometimes what i do is stand on a chair or on a higher place and just starts to look around me, just to realize that everything is just the same and if there are changes it may be good or bad for me. When i'm getting tired of everything that has been happening in my life and negativity seems to cover my mind i try to stay positive and pray. That's the best thing to do besides all other things...

A year ago during this time of year, i don't think that he even knows (my boyfriend that is...) or remember but i do. It was our first kiss, we were at work alone together. We were arguing/having some dare thing, he says "Halikan kita diyan." and i replied back saying "Sige kung kaya mo!". He suddenly comes near me and gave me a smack. For some reason whenever i think about this it lets me reminisce of how it all started. Bestfriends daw kami yun ang say nya sa mga friends namin, yeah right as if everyone really sees that with us. Anyway it's been a long journey and it all ends up the way it's supposed to be. Basta all i know is that i am very happy though sometimes may sad part well it's part of being in a relationship. Have a nice week..... Enjoy summer....

TO BE OR NOT TO BE...

"Regrets are a waste of time. They're the past crippling you in the present. " Katherine (Under The Tuscan Sun)

Can you be friends with your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend? It's not like he asked me too but when i think of what she had done to him and how she treated him in the past. It just hits me but then again i wasn't even in their shoes when they were going out. Maybe i just can't stand people using other people especially when that person is someone i know. For whatever reason i just can't stand at the thought that that person can even be such a b***h for even thinking that she can get away from everything just like that. I just don't want to regret in the end that i ever did such a thing, i'm not a difficult person to get along but there are somethings that really makes me wonder and i just can't take it these kind of people. I am a good person once you get to know me but it there are things that annoys me and this one is....

Maybe in time i'd be able to understand about these kind of things..... have a nice weekend ahead of you!!!!

SUDDENLY IT'S 4EVER (sana!)....

Here's a thought for people like me who's always been thinking a lot... what if your life seems to be a routine like every single day of your life all you do is do the same routine over and over again then suddenly someone step into your life. And this special someone made a major impact on you like he/she turns your world upside down. What seems to be boring before is now what you look forward in doing. Giving you inspiration to be able to do things and be contented about it.

Back in the days i used to have this webpage and i used to be able to write about things that usually happens in my life but since i started this journal/webpage of mine i wasn't able to do so in the start. Because things were different back then until now.... I was able to talk to Mylene in the wee hours of the morning since we are just a call away from each other. I was a little bit annoyed about a certain thing. Anyway for me to forget about my annoyance towards this thing i might as well divert my attention.

I was surprised yesterday afternoon when my boyfriend said that we'll be going to the park since it was like 84 degress F, it was hot and we were both bored staying at home. We were sleeping the whole day and we needed some fresh air. I am not used of him asking me but i didn't show it. But deep down i was thrilled since we hardly go out on a saturday. There was always something about us going out like any ordinary relationship, this seems so natural when it comes to us.

Like we've known each other for a very long time, so sure we've seen each other like when we were college but we never really meet back then. We may have passed each other at the hallway or maybe we have exchange glances but never really bothered to really look. I guess we were meant to see each other again cause this time we have gotten to know each other very well. At the very start it was just a friendly prank between us, since we're of the same age and we were just playing along a role but i never thought that the pretend roles we were playing would eventually be true. We fell in love along the way but there was a complication between us. So much for being true to myself i was in love with the guy but things weren't what i expected it to be. At the very start of our relationship those were difficult times until recently things started to fall into place.

Lately the picture of us has been some kind of an emotional impact on me. I can't even start the thoughts that has been on my mind. Maybe in time i can figure everything out but for the moment i'd just like to live the present and enjoy every moment of it. So there i am out and i am proud of it...