HAPPY THOUGHTS FOR THE NEW YEAR

Just one more night and it's going to be a new year. As the year 2006 enters there's one more special celebration I wouldn't miss. I guess what most of you didn't know is that Ian and I will be celebrating our one year anniversary. (I can't even believe it myself!) Wow! one year had already passed that's the first for me. How time fly so fast. It's just like yesterday that we started going out, talking on the phone each time something interesting or funny that happened on the spot, the "slumber party" every now and then, laundry day date, exchange of lunch for my 'baon na ulam and rice' for McDonald's and a lot of things of how everything had started between us. How i stayed when he asked me to and of all the things he was/is to me.

Totoo na ata to! For real nga say ni mylene lol! I've got so much on my mind right now and still i pray for my dreams to come true. The dream of becoming a professional Occupational Therapist and the dream of somedy having my own business. It's only a matter of time when i finally get it. Then there's still news about telling my parents the truth about Ian and me. Sabi ko nga again it's just a matter of time when i'm ready i know i'll be able to tell them the truth.

Anyway going back about the celebration i've got some plans but we still need to discussed it. Syempre A, B and C ang plans namin. Ewan ko ba i'm excited to clebrate it because it's the first for me i would like it to be special. I know for a fact that this year would be different so i'm looking forward to it. I've got this good vision and how things would be but nevertheless i'm still crossing my fingers. For some unknown reason i know that i'm getting what i want because i know that i deserve it.

Anyway i'm leaving you guys with this quote from Meg Ryan and Kevin Kline's movie French Kiss. I do hope everyone enjoy celebrating the new year. "No matter what I might seem like tonight, it's still the same old me from yesterday you wind up with tomorrow." Kate (French Kiss)

CHRISTMAS PHOTO

Our Christmas 2005 photo... We spent it at his cousin's house. We had receive some great gifts. You could also see some of his relatives behind us.

NEOPET WONDERLAND

So the other day I happened to see this really good friend of mine, see they didn't have classes that day. As it turns out they had to go with their dad to work which made me happy cause I haven't seen them for a while... I'm talking about my boss' 2 young children Daena and Jr. It has been a year or so that I've met this youngster. We even went to the beach together like two summers ago. I've gotten to know them while I was working part time at the Filipino store I used to work at. Anyway since then whenever we see each other we just had such a good time together like I was young again. Talking about cartoons and others stuffs. I know, I know it just so happens that being with these two makes me feel young and well let's face it having them around makes my work lighter, like I don't have to deal with everything so seriously.

So there they were that day and we each exchange our usual greetings and after a while we get back at just basically talking about anything at all. We try to make out the best everytime we see each other and as for my part I try my best to make them feel comfortable and safe around me. So when I got the chance to talk to Daena that day she was still asking me to sign up at Neopet in the internet. Unlike before she was talking non-stop about it but now it was the other way around I keep asking her about it. So needless to say I kept my promise of signing up and we end up exchanging emails. Oh did I forgot to tell you guys that Daena is like 8 or 9 years old and as for Jr his like 7 or 8 years old. Talk about being a child again...lol!

Daena is this really sweet girl and she's also very pretty besides being smart. As for Jr he's this really cute little boy who can brighten up everyone's day with his smile. They both try to annoy me when I work but how can I be annoyed with such sweet and kind kids.

So when I signed up for Neopet, I found it very interesting and it even had games. I discovered a whole new world having a neopet and taking care of it among other stuffs. It was such a cool website. So did my boyfriend Ian who enjoys playing the games. So if ever you guys wants to browse here's the website address: www.neopet.com I do hope you guys enjoy.

What a week that was! Although I've been trying not to take my work little complications at least I got to see them and they did make my week better.

My ToP 10 WiSh LiST CHRiSTMaS 2005

10 ToP WiSH LiST:

1. CD PaRoKYa Ni eDGaR - halina sa parokya (latest); inuman sessions vol 1; jingle balls silent night holy cow; buruguduystunstuguduystuy; khangkhungkherrnitz.... Well i wanted this to complete my collection of their albums...

2. CoMPLeTe SeaSoN oF MeTeoR GaRDeN - Just for the sake to watch how Dao Ming Si and San Cai fall in love over and over again..... Hehehe! sorry guys cheapatoni kasi ako eh....

3. 3RD SeaSoN oF RoSWeLL - another collection of mine....

4. WHoLe DaY aT THe SPa or MaNiCuRe aND PeDiCuRe TReaTMeNT - Syempre i need to kick back and relax and be beautiful. Di ba Mylene?

5. eVeLYN Perfume by CrabTree and Evelyn (i'm not sure kung tama itech!!!!) - favorite ko kasi yan perfume besides Tommy Hilfiger for women..... (hint-hint anyone!!!) hehehehe!

6. A Pair of New SNeaKeRS - For the new year syempre... skechers or reebok or whatever!!! dapat may touch of fink este pink... hehehe!!!

7. OaKLeY TeaSPooN - I've been dying to have a new sunglasses since like forever...

8. a NeW CeLLPHoNe NoKia 8801 - Masyado pa syang mahal right now like $1000 so wait ko muna unless somebody really wants to give me that for a gift exchange gift ko yun current cp ko!

9. a LaPToP CoMPuTeR - Eventually it will happen soon lol!!!!

10. SHoPPiNG SPRee FoR a DaY WiTH $1000 GiFT CeRTiFiCaTe - Wow! Sarap sana no? Hehehe!!!

So where's Santa Claus? Hope he's listening to my top 10 wish list. Anyway enjoy your weekend everyone!!!

OuT oF ReAcH

...out of Reached...

Gabrielle

Knew the signs

Wasn't right

I was stupid for a while

Swept away by you

And now i feel like a fool

So confused,

My heart's bruised

Was i ever loved by you?

Out of reach, so far

I never had your heart

Out of reach,

Couldn't see

We were never

Meant to be

Catch myself

From despair

I could drown

If i stay here

Keeping busy everyday

I know i will be ok

But i was

So confused,

My heart's bruised

Was i ever loved by you?

Out of reach, so far

I never had your heart

Out of reach,

Couldn't see

We were never

Meant to be

So much hurt,

So much pain

Takes a while

To regain

What is lost inside

And i hope that in time,

You'll be out of my mind

And i'll be over you

But now i'm

So confused,

My heart's bruised

Was i ever loved by you?

Out of reach,So far

I never had your heart

Out of reach,

Couldn't see

We were never

Meant to be

Out of reach,So far

You never gave your heart

In my reach, i can see

There's a life out there

For me

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

"If we live our lives the right way then everything we do can become a work of art." Claire (Six Feet Under)

I've always think that life is not what we just take for granted and waste it on things that doesn't matter to us. Everyone tries their best to make the most out of it. Enjoy life and live it simple. For some reason people would always believed in what they hear and see but wouldn't it be better if you just believe it when you actually experienced it. I guess some people just enjoyed making gossips and letting everyone believe about things.

Well let's change the topic masyado serious. It's another thanksgiving and this is my third time... this time it's different kasi i have someone special. The first one was when I first came here and it was with my cousins. That was a cool and happy thanksgiving because that was my first. The second time was spent at my boss' house at Warren I was with two of my co-worker (Ate Ludy and Ian; my then again friend before there was an US.). It was cool and I have gotten close with my boss' grandkids. Got to meet her husband and kids. This year was quite special I spent it with my cousins and with my boyfriend Ian. I was with the important people in my life and well though the record isn't straight yet with my life I'm happy to know that I am very lucky. I am very thankful of what i have for the moment and of what i become being on my own.

I have my wishlist in my mind for the coming christmas so i just might post it next time... Anyway i do hope everyone enjoy their thanksgiving.

COOL PHOTOS

Some photos taken during Parokya ni Edgar gig at Grand Banks Cafe last November 4,2005.

PAROKYA NI EDGAR 4EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HARANA
uso pa ba ang harana?

marahil ikaw ay nagtataka...

"sino ba 'tong mukhang gago?

nagkandarapa sa pagkanta

at nasisintunado sa kaba..."

meron pang dalang mga rosas

suot nama'y maong na kupas!

at nariyan pa ang barkada

nakaporma, naka-barong

sa awiting daig pang minus-one at sing-along...

puno ang langit ng bituin

at kay lamig pa ng hangin s

a 'yong tingin ako'y nababaliw,

giliw at sa awitin kong ito

sana'y maibigan mo

ibubuhos ko ang buong puso ko... s

a isang munting harana... para sa 'yo

hindi ba't parang isang sine?

isang pelikulang romantiko

hindi ba't ikaw ang bidang artista

at ako ang 'yong leading man

sa istoryang nagwawakas

sa pag-ibig na wagas...

puno ang langit ng bituin

at kay lamig pa ng hangin

sa 'yong tingin ako'y nababaliw,

giliw at sa awitin kong ito

sana'y maibigan mo

ibubuhos ko ang buong puso ko...

sa isang munting harana...

para sa 'yo

I was totally speechless when i came upon this knowledge that boyfriend has this plan of taking me to the Parokya ni Edgar concert. Well i wasn't even thinking that it would come true kasi we have this thing of not really making plans when it comes to watching a concert. As for me i was hoping that we would watch it but then again I don't want to be disappointed like last year though at that time there was never an US until this year. Anyway so the day of the concert (November 4) came and though part of me was praying for that day to end so we can finally go to the concert. Syempre i was confident that we will be really there na kasi Ian keeps reminding me about it. He was talking non-stop about it the whole day. It was a touching moment for me realizing how important I was to him.

When we arrived at the venue i started to looked around for familiar faces baka kasi may mga naligaw ako na kakilala anyway there were lots of people and i was surprised to see different generations. Mostly young people or people around my age who were there. The common denominator was we were all Filipinos. The show started past 8 pm, the front act was a new jersey based band called something... i feel sorry for them because i can not remember their name anyway they were good and most of the peeps enjoyed their songs. Then the announcer said that after the front act there would be another one syempre the peeps were annoyed already by this time kasi nga they've been waiting for a long time for PNE to perform tapos may other band pa before them. What we didn't know eh sila na pala. First there was dindin checking his guitar then Buwi appeared and so as Gab and Darius. At first they were checking they're instruments. The whole crowd went wild to see them and after a while they started shouting Chito's name the vocalist but he didn't appeared yet after 10-15 minutes he did. Although they were already drank while performing they were really good. Ang kukulit nga nila and still they showed that they were definitely one of the BEST band in the Philippines.

They played were the following: Sayang, Harana, SilverToes, Para Sayo, Don't touch my Birdie, This guy's in love with you pare, Halaga, Yes yes show, Buloy, Mr. Suave, Chikinini... and the list goes on!

Once again they blew me away especially when I saw Buwi see among the group he has been my crush since i discovered them. Grabe ang galing talaga nila. From the moment Chito sang i was singing along with him as well as the crowd. The crowd just goes wild with every song they perform.

Though the place was small everyone got to enjoy the concert and well it was worth it. This the first time i've ever see them perform live. I did saw a friend there, Mayla she was with her husband.

With that let me end this with another song.

SAYANG

sayang bakit hindi kita niligawan

ngayon akoy nanghihinayang

kasi naman tatanga-tanga pa ako noon

walang humpay na paghintay sa hindi

dumarating na pagkakataon

lagi naman kitang nakakasama

ewan ko kung bakit ba wala pa ring nagagawa

kahit na napakadali mong kausapin

ewan ko ba kung bakit ang hirap pa ring aminin

madalas naman tayong naglolokohan

dinadaan ko nalang sa biro ang tunay kong nararamdaman

kaya siguro hindi mo sineryoso ang aking mga sinabi

yan tuloy walang nangyari

kakalipas lamang ng isang sem

nung makita kita na mayroon ibang kasama

magkahawak ang inyong mga kamay

ang dibdib ko ay sumikip

ang paglunok ko ay naipit

aking napatunayan na nasa huli ang pagsisisi

para bang gusto kong umiyak ngunit para saan pa

wala namang magagawa

SO THERE IT WAS...

"Lois, I promise, someday...you'll meet someone even more special." Clark Kent (Smallville)

So there it was Clark said to Lois in this particular episode when she asked "I've known a lot of guys who want to own the world. I haven't met very many who actually want to save it. How am I ever going to meet someone like that again?". There i was thinking to myself as i always do to the point that sometimes i feel that i don't even make any sense at all.... anyway back to my thoughts, as i was saying it had been a few years ago that i was once like Lois asking of how am I ever going to meet someone like that again?. See back then I've met guys that i had admired or had this crushes on then feeling heartbroken everytime i would find out that they are already taken or are wooing some girl. Oh di ba talagang feeling depressed?

During those times I was feeling down and syempre when most of my friends have soomeone for them i was asking myself bakit ako wala?That's one of those questions i used to asked myself for some reason I envy people having a boyfriend/girlfriend but then again siguro that's why i was so into romantic movies or watching tv series having love themes like Dawson's Creek; the Dawson and Joey love affair and then there was Buffy; Angel and Buffy never ending love team which in my mind still exist (hehehe!), Jack and Jill and my lists goes on.... So as it turns out i've always enjoyed the feeling i get everytime I watch a TV series or romantic-comedy movies though right now my boyfriend isn't into it but then every once in a while i do rent romanic-movies and make him watch it with me....

Then there songs that makes you more depressed about feeling alone and lonely for being single. For some unknown reasons I usually find myself one of those people not blessed with the so-called qualities like other girls who can attract guys so easily. Maybe things are different but for me i was one of those people who are called late bloomers when it comes relationship wise or falling in love.

Come present day... I have a special someone and well of course he's not only that to me but also a bestfriend. I never thought that I would find someone like him. Sometimes I still can't believe that I am in a relationship and that my patience did paid off. Whatever happens i still believe that there are someone meant for everyone. It just takes time for every individual to be able to find their soulmate, for those still in search or maybe still waitnig to be found i say God has his own reasons for it.

Enjoy the weekend ahead.

I FALL SO DEEP

I Fall So Deep

Gary Barlow

I'm always thinkin' about you

I wonder if you can tell

These things I'm feelin' inside me

I keep them all to myself

Scared to show my true emotions

Don't wanna love alone

Because I fall, so deep

You'll never know

How far I go

And I know why

Hearts beat, desperately

I fall so deep

yeah I fall so deep,

Some people think love is foolish

While others think it's a game

I think that love is a fire

I'm burnin' up in your flame

I'm so lost in my emotions

Wanting you ever more, ooh ooh

Because I fall, so deep

You'll never know

How far I go

And I know why

Hearts beat, desperately

I fall so deep

I fall so deep

I fall so deep

I fall so deep

And I've come so close to the part

Where I reveal my heart to you

But I lose my nerve, can't find the words

To tell that it's true

I fall so deep

I fall, so deep

You'll never know

How far I go

And I know why

Hearts beat, oh so desperately

I fall so deep

I fall, so deep

You'll never know (never know)

How far I go (you'll never know)

And I know why

Hearts beat, desperately

I fall so deep

I'm always thinkin' about you (I fall so deep)

I wonder if you can tell (and I fall so deep)

These things I'm feelin' inside me (I fall so deep)

'Cause I fall so deep

LIFE'S DECISION

"One journey has ended a new one has begun." Jor-El (Smallville)

I had to search for this quote i got from smallville since it's premiere. I just wanted to share it with you guys since this just made me think for sometime now... I must admit that i'm feeling peaceful with myself, it's sort of this serene feeling knowing that i've made certain decisions in my life that i won't be regretting anytime soon. I'm just hoping and praying that HE would guide me all through out. Serious ko naman noh? it's just so happens that part of my personality is mostly the serious side and the flip side. I think i'm kinda weird in a way that only a few people can truly understand me. Then there's my being so impulsive at certain things like in my actions and words. Sometimes i feel that my life doesn't really makes sense at all but i do trust fate for whatever/wherever it leads me then maybe there's a

good reason behind it...

Another journey has begun that is for me to say... some may not understand it and for some who trust me they supports me about it. It's been a while and i've been thinking of the person i've become. Of the things i've experience being on my own and becoming an adult. The people that i've met and those who had made an impact in my life. I guess i'm being melodramatic about it all. There are just some changes/decisions that you make and live with it. No one can tell you how to live your life because everything is purely your choice, you made it. Just a reminder to myself of my life's decisions... Anyway enjoy the rest of your week....

MY BEST FRIEND FOR SO MANY YEARS...

We (my Ian and me) went to my apartment and started to packed some other things to be put away in a storage that we rented yesterday. Then when i turn on the TV there it was the title to my blog... IKAW NA LANG SANA movie was on and i was feeling inspired just because it was aga mulach and sharon cuneta love team and also the very thought that there were some scenes that i can relate to and it just makes me feel happy and inspired. For some unknown reasons this movie just makes me happy actually it's a feel good movie. I love that scene where enteng (aga's character) introduces his new grilfriend to em's (sharon's character) saying "Em's my bestfriend for so many years..." and you could see how she reacted to her, she was nice though you could notice how she roll her eyes in disapproval of the new girlfriend. It was a funny scene though and some scenes are touching.

Then it reminds me of a really good friend who once sent me this text message. "I wish we'd grow old friends together. We'd hangout and talk and maybe we could bring our grandchildren along and when they ask us how long we've been friends, we'll smile at them and say ALMOST FOREVER" It just felt good knowing that this guy whom i've been friends since way back in 1999 up until now has stayed the same. Jheremy the king of text... hehehehe! Though we've never talked or even exchange messages i know in my heart that we'll be friends forever!!!!

I've always believed that one day i'll see most of the friends that i've met before and we'd catch up on things. It's just brings me back to good memories. Hay naku puro emote ata ako lately but atleast i'm coming into terms to my life. Yun lang! To everyone reading this thanks for bearing with me. Have a nice week ahead of you....

FAMOUS WORDS 2

This is the follow up for the first famous words of my friends back in college.

1."TIME FIRST" Well she is loved for being a sweet and nice friend. Syempre who could ever forget her famous lines/expressions. Sino pa nga ba itech na girlash? Siaren is her name and Tidon is her surname. Lol...

2. "FINGER LICKING GOOD!" that's one of my favorite line from this guy. Syempre with that expression of his face. He's a very funny guy. Rodel? ikaw ba yon? just kidding!!!

3. "THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT SALLY!" Is there something wrong with this title? Yup he's a little bit corny but then again a really good friend. Everytime we (Mylene and I) talked about this we laugh so hard. He usually tease me a lot about a certain situation back in college. It never bothers me though. Yan si Kuya Allan Mozo, the first guy na naging friend ko during college days.

4. "MUSTA (surname)?" he usually greets you with this. Pansin ko lagi na lang last name and tawag nya pero sometimes he calls us by our 1st name. He's a good friend and syempre matalino yan... wala na ko masabi about him.... That's Christian "Froggy" Garcia!

5. "KUMARE..." That's how he usaully greets us nowadays since most of us are godmothers/godfathers to his son. Well when it comes to jokes eh eto ang hari ng corny though mind you he can makes everyone laugh at his jokes... Business minded din sya... Yan si Weng Parreno!

These are some of the famous words that i've encountered during those years that i spent in college with my circle of friends... I do miss having them around and all our crazy memories...

SoMeTiMe sOoN...

Just the very thought of being in a monogamous relationship i didn't even think that i would be staying the longest in this one. I mean i've had a few guys that i went out with but this one was different from the very beginning til now. Most of my friends might be shock on the decisions i've been making or maybe they're just being supportive and reminding me always as to what direction i am heading. I am blessed with good friends and family who truly understands me. At the moment my life has been good but still got to work on some other stuffs. But only time can tell as to what will happen to us in the future. I don't want to dwell too much on the future but instead enjoy the present. Let's just say i am just going with the flow of life.

Thursday evening i went to my apartment and started to pack some things. Found some memorabilias and it just brings back memories of how everything was at the time that i first moved in and stayed for a while there. I just couldn't believed that a year has already pass. So there i was trying to sort out stuffs that i need and stuffs to throw out. It's been a while since the last time i even slept there and it makes me a little sad knowing that i'd be leaving soon. Maybe it's for the best or maybe there are other plans in store for me. That is yet to be seen. Anyway as of this writing i am celebrating once again something special... wow it has been months that we've been going out and things are just the way as it is.

So i'll just leave you a qoute that has just inspired me. "He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life."-Ralph Waldo Emerson. Enjoy your week friends...

JUST A THOUGHT

"You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... 'til you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it."-Atticus Finch, To Kill a Mockingbird

August 2000 this was the year that first met him... pa-suspense pa eh... sino pa eh yun best guy friend ko si Joseph Jay B. Guadalupe ayan ha buong-buo. Lol... Anyway we met through text messaging. He was sending a message to a friend and sent it by mistake to my phone. From then on we became bestfriends. For some unknown reason we just hit it off. We talk on the phone like every single minute of the day and just like any other old friends that's how we are. Even his then on/off girlfriend was jealous of me just because we became good friends at the time. After five whole years we're still friends and though we don't get to talk on the phone that often like before or write snail mails or even send text messages.... Somehow we have this connection between us, we're not just good friends we're bestfriends. I was the bestfriend that he can talk about anything else under the sun. Sky is the limit as they say it. True enough that he's younger than me but when it comes to certain things in llife he's mature enough to handle it.

How i miss talking on the phone with him or even just exchanging text messages. We used to watch movies together even on the phone. Drinking coffee at dunkin' donut or even going to the video rentals just to rent movies that he usually lets me rent using his card. Watching Harry Potter at (what's the mall's name again?) i totally have forgotten oh yeah Ultimart... When i came here the second time we usually talk every single week and then i usually write to him. Telling him how i am and how i miss having him around. Whenever he comes over at our house just to hang out or just to look at my computer since he's an expert on it. That's the guy i've been bestfriends with since then....

He knows me inside-out and same goes for him. Then came a time that we didn't talk that much and it was hard catching him at home when i needed to talk to him just to say hi or when there was a movie/show that i am watching that i wanted to share with him. It was like i needed to make an appointment just to fit in his hectic schedule. BUT inspite of everything i was the one that he runs to when he needs someone to talk to, problems at home and his problems with his relationships past or present. Even if i wasn't there, it felt like i was still present like he was talking to me in his LETTERS... (that by the way reminds me i think i need to beg him for more of it.... lol!)

I really,really miss you Jay... Hope to hear from you again.

DORNEY PARK

DORNEY PARK August 28,2005

Sunday morning was a cloudy/drizzling day. We're on our trip to Dorney Park in Allentown, Pennsylvania, i was with my cousins and nephew plus a bunch of our friends and syempre my Ian was with us. On our way we encountered two accidents one was a black sedan car which got burned for some unknown reason and the other was juts any other plain accident we usually see at the road. Though it was drizzling that day we had fun on our way to the park since we (Ian and I) we're riding with my cousins and my nephew. We talked about stuffs like when my cousins and i went to the theme parks back home like Star City, Boom na Boom, Big Bang sa Alabang and even Enchanted Kingdom in Sta. Rosa. Reminiscing those days when we were young and those kalokohans we did back then.

Anyway when we arrived there the drizzling turned into rain and even when we got to the entrance to pay for ourticket we were already wet. The first thing we did was ride Talon one fo the rollercoasters which was one of the most aggressive thrill rides as they stated it. I felt a little bit nervous since it has been years that i haven't rode on one. What i didn't know eh yun katabi ko pala eh virgin pa when it comes to such rides like that. I felt honored at the thought that I was with him going through those rides mega next to each other kami lol... After the second ride which was called Hang Time, some tried to ride again and some went to the arcade. After a while we went ot the picnic table and ate, everyone got hungry by this time.

Then here comes one of the big rides i was feeling nervous as walks towards this ride named Steel Force. Watching it makes my stomach turns upside down but then again it was part of the fun. At first Ian didn't want to go but i took his hand and off we go. The ride didn't have anything to protect you from the chest but it had just a seatbelt and horizontal bar holding us. Which makes me more nervous at this time. See the ride has to go way, way, way up like your on your way to heaven but then after the first one it continues on up and down, up and down you go i was like a hiker walking up and down the mountains. It was fast and your adrenaline just keeps pumping. All i can do was scream out loud to get that feeling of nervousness out of my system. It was good while it lasted (di ba Mylene?).

Since the rain has stopped we were once more dry but the boatrides got us wet again this time it was different because for some reason i'm not so afraid of this rides unlike the rollercoasters. I was shivering cold by this time. Then there was the waves at the pool, some went to another ride with the salbabida and for someof us the waves of the pool was better. It was cloudy and cold but it was fun. As it turns out everything was cool and everyone got to enjoy though it was cloudy and drizzling at times. The sun showed up when we were about to go home.

Buti nalang di pa tapos ang summer kaya this was one memorable summer of my life tapos i was with my Ian... Oh di ba bonggacious talaga!!!!!!! Hope everyone had a good summer! Sana next time Mylene, Celeste, Jay and the rest of my friends makapunta kayo dito and we can all enjoy teh theme parks as well.....

THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!

Summer is nearly coming to an end and though the cold air is slowly coming its way here, i would love to extend summer. Hoping that it would be just like home, the weather i mean. I've got some stuffs to decide on when it comes to my priorities and lovelife. I wasn't in a total slumber the whole time i wasn't writing here or updating my blog but it feels like for sometime I just couldn't express myself or maybe was too afraid to reveal myself too much but then again this is who i am. Reminiscing the good old days with Mylene the other night was fun, remembering the things i wrote and how i felt during college days. Hay grabe how time flies so fast talaga... Maraming changes but for the better... I'm still crossing my fingers about certain things in my life na sana makuha ko na...

So here's a poem given to me by a good,good friend MALVIN. I'm sharing it as he shared it with me....

On that night of fourteen
away from the lights, down from afar
hilltop mountains where sweet moments are
a sweet quiet place where you find rest
next with the one you love the best..

spirits rise and let it be free
a passionate feeling of she and he
let love conquer, isn't it nice
such thing that you cannot compromise..

a love is faith, a love is intimate
a love is pure with a human soul
he comes close and take her whole
the mind floats, the river flows..

he lays her close, he hugs with all might
a wonderful event, an unforgettable night
so good to remember, so good to foresee
souls taken, souls of you and me....

MARGARETVILLE, NEW YORK

August 12,2005 around 9pm we (with boyfriend Ian, my cousins and some of our friends)we're on our way to Gateway Lodge Bed and Breakfast Highmount, New York. We're staying for the weekend there for Lance' first birthday at Tita Julie's golfcourse . Our first night everyone settled down at to who's who would be staying at the rooms avaialable for us. We had occupied the whole second floor. After we had settled down and so the drinking starts there was beers and smirnoffs's vodka with flavor such as watermelon, raspberry and black cherry. For the first two bottles i had i was a bit dizzy and after two more bottles that was it for me. I thought that i could still drink like i used to back in college but that turns out to be so wrong for the following day i had my worst hangover. It was a sick feeling of throwing up and going to the bathroom for no. 2 hehehehehe!!!!!!! I was happy that finally Ian had agreed to join me and my cousins. This is the first time that they'll get to know each other. That very afternoon we went tubing on a stream. Everyone came except for the two kids and Kuya's family who'll be busy for the party. It was a five miles going down the stream on a tube (aka salbabida), it has a platform wood in the middle that's where you sit on and strins on the side where you hold on to but as for me the most fun part was being with Ian. We talked, laugh and just had a good time together. At the party which was held at the golfcourse of my tita Julie and her husband Russ, we ate so much because the tubing made everyone so hungry. The following day we went to an underground cave Howe Cavern's that took us like an hour or so from Margaretville. It's 52 degrees farenheit all year round at the cave and i was just wearing a sleeveless top and miniskirt while everyone has a sweater on. It was my second time there and well taking pictures was always part of the groups habit. It didn't really matter that i didn't have any sweater because i do have someone to hug me. LOL.... Anyway this was one of the best weekend i've had so far this summer. So that was weekend...

AUGUST 13-14, 2005 MARGARETVILLE, NEW YORK

FAMOUS WORD/S

Mylene and i had talked about the favorite expressions of our friends and well i came up with this idea of reminiscing most of it, so please bare with me. I just might not remember the exact expressions but i'll try my best to remember...

1."SUNGGABAN MO NA YAN!" this was one of my favorite line from Mylene, when i tell her of stories about my crushes or guys that i like. Syempre significant itech during the time i went to see a movie with Jay and she sent me this through text. Lam mo naman My your my love guru lol!!!!!
2. "STOP DEFENDING HER!" How can i forget this one? this is one of my unforgettable expression... Di ba nga Mylene naging private joke natin to? I'm not going to mention names but you know who you are. Don't worry we're cool now...
3. "CONGO" (without the silent G) Che-Che said when we were about to watch the movie back in college. Serious pa sya when she said this. Comedy tong si che sa true to life, she has always been a happy person buti na lang di pikon kaya nga favorite namin ni sherwin yan eh. Lab u che!!! Take note never ata to nawalan ng lovelife.
4. "PAST IS PAST" Wyngard had said this so many times before during college whenever asked about the courting thing. Syempre kami ni Mylene naging significant ang expression for us...
5. "NAKAKASUSOT!" Mirriam usually says this whenever she is irritated on something or someone. It's the same thing as "nakaka-inis" but when you say the word it's kinda funny in your ears esp if it is the first time you hear it.
6. "IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON!" Ronald has said this one time when we had our get together with the barkada. This was the time that he wasn't in a relationship but was seeing a supposedly new girl. Ano fa nga favorite pa rin namin ni Mylene itech.
7. "SHUTTT UPPP....." Bheng has this tone of her voice that really makes us laugh everytime she uses this one. Like it goes up and down and it takes a long time before she follows up with her stories. Who could ever forget a voice like hers? Kaya nga she is well loved eh...
8. "KAMUSTA ANG LOVELIFE?" Isagani usually asks this everytime we see each other and with his always smiling face. Syempre feeling pa rin nya wholesome sya pero let the truth be told he's not. Kidding aside he's such a cheerful person and di nauubusan ng tsismaxx...

Well that's all folks!!!!! Try to follow up next time for the rest of the barkada....

BREAKING THE HABIT

Breaking The Habit
Linkin Park
Memories consume like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume,
I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again

I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...

Clutching my cure, I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more, than any time before
I have no options left again

I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confuse

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight…

I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...

The song goes on and on in my head as i write now.... I just had to make a change of heart cause deep down i know i'm a good person but for whatever reason there's some people who thinks that i have a bad attitude. It just takes me while to accept wholeheartedly some situations or the people i am involved with like my boyfriend Ian ex-girlfriend as of this writing i am ready to deal with it. I should be the one to have better understanding of everything. Should i make the first move or should i wait and see what happens next? Well let's wait and see what happens next...

It'S mY pArTy....

"And When the shares of pure light
dance in her eyes,
I see my angel for the first time
know my purpose,
feel my birth
Hear at first faintly,
then distinctly the sweet strains of our union
Our love heats up the cold universe
Gives my tired,
Desperate hope a reason
and season to be revealed
We purified by our kisses
Our eternity healed."

So goes this poem i got from watching The Saint which stars Val Kilmer one of my secret boyfriends (hope my real boyfriend won't get jealous!!!!!!! hahahahaha!!!) anyway this is one of my favorite movie. It shows the passion of the person to another and how they love each other. It just brings me back to a time where i was inspired as i am now....

So it's been a while we've been together for a few months now and well it was a rocky start full of complications. I just can't believe that i stayed this long in a relationship, see in the past it wasn't as real as this nor this serious. I guess it goes with the age. Things has been going my way and well just a few more things that i have to accomplished which i'm hoping it would come and then i would be fullfilled. I can still remember our first date at the movies. I was supposed to watch somethings else, this one i forgot. Saturday morning i accompanied him with his work and he told me that he would like to join me. So i said yes but he still had to go home and hit the shower. I went to his place and waited for him when we got to Jersey Gardens, he asked if we could watch another movie instead of the one i was going to watch. So i said yes, as it turns out we both enjoyed the movie it was "Chronicles of Riddick" that was last summer. We were friends back then and we were more like buddies. It feels like we've known each other for such a long time. Now everything is different and it feels good to know that someone cares truly and loves me back....

It's my time to party and celebrate this day........... It's feels like V-day for me. I do hope those who reads this know what this day means to me..... It's our monthsary... ang term medyo baduy at wala sa dictionary but it does exists.... Hehehe!!!!!!! Anyway enjoy the week ahead........

VIRGINIA BEACH

My boyfriend Ian and me at Virginia Beach taken last July 3, 2005.

JEALOUSY?????

Ok let me get this straight i just couldn't admit it but i am the jealous type BUT i try to be reasonable not to be. My boyfriend thinks that i am still jealous of his ex-gf maybe in the past but right now in this moment in time i don't think i am and he won't believed it. It's just that there's something about her that bothers me and well you know how it is there will always be someone that you don't feel at ease with maybe it has something to do with the past or maybe it's just her personality itself, i just don't know. But when i saw her for the first time or maybe the second time, since i just saw her back during the time they were still together (hehehe!), i felt nothing it's like when he sees his friends and i get to meet them personally. I can't even explain why i sometimes have this feelings towards her but don't take it personally i'm just still undecided about it. I was talking to a good friend of mine Engineer Raymond (WOW such a big word!) and he was telling me that it's just natural to be jealous but you should know how to handle it. It's such a puzzle that i haven't even heard her good side cause everything i know about her is the bad side. Maybe given the chance i might be able to understand who she really is but then again let's just leave it that way.

Relationships you really have to work hard on it. Kaloka nga talaga di ba Mylene? Well i'm still in this certain phase of how reality bites. I don't want to be this angry person with repressed feelings. Anyway i hope to anyone who's reading this understands my point of view... so enjoy the weekend!

WEST SIDE STORY

We (my boyfriend ian and me) were on our way to returning the dvd/vcd's we borrowed from the video store when we saw this girl and she waved at him, when i looked at him he was waving back. I was about to ask him who she was but i had to get out of the car to return the dvd/vcds. When i came back to the car, i wanted to ask him who the girl was but as it turns out he was the one who brought it up. It was the ex-girlfriend... I didn't even recognize her for she looks so innocent. I just couldn't believe that it was her for i have never met her personally and i just know her through the pictures i saw in friendster, her personal profile and from my boyfriend's email address (she usually send tons of pictures of her). For an instance i didn't feel a pinch of anger towards her since the things she had done to my boyfriend maybe it was a blessing in disguise that i didn't know it was her waving at him. For just once i wasn't feeling angry at her maybe because i know deep down that I AM THE PRESENT and it's me that he's with. In the past whenever i know that he's been with her or even talked to her either thru chat or by phone it just makes me cringe in anger asking myself why he's still friends or why he's still in a relationship that's been failing. I guess that everything is sinking in now and i have a better understanding of everything.

So that's my west side story...

AFTER THE RAIN, WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

I often think of what happens after the rain comes pouring down, does it make everything clear like when things aren't going your way and all you have to do is cry it out or just simply have a long walk. Does everything comes back the way it used to be or simply a brand new solution reveals itself? Do you really think that things just makes everything clear just like a brand new day has come? After the lightning and thunderstorm, maybe a strong wind or a light rain, do you ever realize that everything changes?

Sometimes what i do is stand on a chair or on a higher place and just starts to look around me, just to realize that everything is just the same and if there are changes it may be good or bad for me. When i'm getting tired of everything that has been happening in my life and negativity seems to cover my mind i try to stay positive and pray. That's the best thing to do besides all other things...

A year ago during this time of year, i don't think that he even knows (my boyfriend that is...) or remember but i do. It was our first kiss, we were at work alone together. We were arguing/having some dare thing, he says "Halikan kita diyan." and i replied back saying "Sige kung kaya mo!". He suddenly comes near me and gave me a smack. For some reason whenever i think about this it lets me reminisce of how it all started. Bestfriends daw kami yun ang say nya sa mga friends namin, yeah right as if everyone really sees that with us. Anyway it's been a long journey and it all ends up the way it's supposed to be. Basta all i know is that i am very happy though sometimes may sad part well it's part of being in a relationship. Have a nice week..... Enjoy summer....

TO BE OR NOT TO BE...

"Regrets are a waste of time. They're the past crippling you in the present. " Katherine (Under The Tuscan Sun)

Can you be friends with your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend? It's not like he asked me too but when i think of what she had done to him and how she treated him in the past. It just hits me but then again i wasn't even in their shoes when they were going out. Maybe i just can't stand people using other people especially when that person is someone i know. For whatever reason i just can't stand at the thought that that person can even be such a b***h for even thinking that she can get away from everything just like that. I just don't want to regret in the end that i ever did such a thing, i'm not a difficult person to get along but there are somethings that really makes me wonder and i just can't take it these kind of people. I am a good person once you get to know me but it there are things that annoys me and this one is....

Maybe in time i'd be able to understand about these kind of things..... have a nice weekend ahead of you!!!!

SUDDENLY IT'S 4EVER (sana!)....

Here's a thought for people like me who's always been thinking a lot... what if your life seems to be a routine like every single day of your life all you do is do the same routine over and over again then suddenly someone step into your life. And this special someone made a major impact on you like he/she turns your world upside down. What seems to be boring before is now what you look forward in doing. Giving you inspiration to be able to do things and be contented about it.

Back in the days i used to have this webpage and i used to be able to write about things that usually happens in my life but since i started this journal/webpage of mine i wasn't able to do so in the start. Because things were different back then until now.... I was able to talk to Mylene in the wee hours of the morning since we are just a call away from each other. I was a little bit annoyed about a certain thing. Anyway for me to forget about my annoyance towards this thing i might as well divert my attention.

I was surprised yesterday afternoon when my boyfriend said that we'll be going to the park since it was like 84 degress F, it was hot and we were both bored staying at home. We were sleeping the whole day and we needed some fresh air. I am not used of him asking me but i didn't show it. But deep down i was thrilled since we hardly go out on a saturday. There was always something about us going out like any ordinary relationship, this seems so natural when it comes to us.

Like we've known each other for a very long time, so sure we've seen each other like when we were college but we never really meet back then. We may have passed each other at the hallway or maybe we have exchange glances but never really bothered to really look. I guess we were meant to see each other again cause this time we have gotten to know each other very well. At the very start it was just a friendly prank between us, since we're of the same age and we were just playing along a role but i never thought that the pretend roles we were playing would eventually be true. We fell in love along the way but there was a complication between us. So much for being true to myself i was in love with the guy but things weren't what i expected it to be. At the very start of our relationship those were difficult times until recently things started to fall into place.

Lately the picture of us has been some kind of an emotional impact on me. I can't even start the thoughts that has been on my mind. Maybe in time i can figure everything out but for the moment i'd just like to live the present and enjoy every moment of it. So there i am out and i am proud of it...

THIS IS REALLY IS IT....

"The hardest part of love isn't loving someone, but having the courage to let them love you back." Nick Mercer (The Wedding Date)

It's been a long journey for me when it comes to finding that special someone. So far i've been in a harmonious relationship with my boyfriend though the hardest part was the first few months. It's been all tears and pain for me, i can not even speak my heart out because i knew from the start the choice i made and if there's anyone to blame that would be me. But so far things has been doing great in terms of my relationship. I can not say that we have the perfect one but it's ALMOST PERFECT. No one can truly understand what i have been through these past few months but all i can say is that PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE! This only means that everything that had happened was worth it.

I can not describe the feelings i have right now nor can decipher everything that had happened but this i can say I HAVE NO REGRETS OR WHATSOEVER! I am in a phase in my life where i am still accomplishing my goals in life. So now i can shout to the world "THIS IS REALLY IS IT PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!". It feels good to be truly be out in the open. So now the whole world knows ane ony thing that bothers me a little is that everyone wants to know about it.

There are somethings that i'd rather keep to myself and somethings that i can share. There are some exceptions syempre... only a few people knows about it and guys you know who you are.

A DREAM COME TRUE... in my mind.

All I Ask Of You

No more talk to darkness

Forget these wide-eyed fears

I'm here

Nothing can harm you

My words will warm and calm you

Let me be your freedom

Let daylight dry your tears

I'm here

With you, beside you

To guard you and to guide you

Say you love me every winter morning

Turn my head with talk of summertime

Say you need me with you now and always

Promise me that all you say is true

That's all I ask of you

Let me be your shelter

Let me be your light

You're safe

No one will find you

Your fears are far behind you

All I want is freedom

A world with no more night

And you

Always beside me

To hold me and to hide me

Then say you'll share with me one love,

One lifetime

Let me lead you from your solitude

Say you need me with you,

Here beside you

Anywhere you go, let me go too

Christine that's all I ask of you

Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime

Say the word and I will follow you

Share each day with me,

Each night, each morning

Say you love me (You know I do)

Love me

That's all I ask of you

Anywhere you go, let me go too

Love me That's all I ask of you

It's a dream song that i'd like to have for my future wedding...

THE LOVE WE'VE ALWAYS WANTED

"I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough." Noah (The Notebook)

Last night i was talking to Mylene and she did mention that i was too mysterious when it comes to me writing here, well in fact i am in a way trying to be so patient and to hide the truth . I guess from her I just couldn't hide anything she knows me inside-out. I simply can't hide the fact that i am very cautious to what i write especially about my lovelife. It seems that i try not to spill everything out, i guess it's still a working progress and things aren't normal as i've always mentioned it here. I'd rather keep everything to myself for the moment and still express my feelings about stuffs that I have been going through for the moment.

Lately i've been feeling sad but i try not to show it physically but deep down there's something missing in me, and that part of my life seems to break me into pieces but still i try to think positively. Maybe out of all these things i've been going through is a white light that can give me hope in the future. I thought everything would be clear but ii guess i was wrong, still i have doubts and maybe in time this will be gone i just hope that it would not be too late.

Last night i read this post from the friendster's bulletin board and let me share this one...

if a girl cries in front of u,

it means that she couldnt take it anymore.

If u take her hand,

she would stay with u for the rest of ur life;

If u let her go,

she couldnt go back to being herself anymore.

A gal wont cry easily,

except in front of the person whom

she loves the most,

she becomes weak.

A gal wont cry easily,

only when she love u the most,

she put down her ego.

Guys,

if a gal cries bcoz of u,

please hold her hands firmly,

coz she's the one who is willing to stay with u 4 for the rest of ur life.

Guys,

if a gal cries bcoz of u,

please dont give her up,

maybe bcoz of ur decision,

u ruin her life.

When she cry rite in front of u,

When she cry bcoz of u,

Look into her eyes,

Can u see n feel the pain n hurt she's feeling?

Think.

Which other girl have cried with pure sincerity,

In front of u,

And bcoz of u?

She cries not because she is weak,

She cries not bcoz she wants sympathy or pity,

She cries,

Because crying silently is no longer possible,

the pain, hurt n agony have bcome too big a burden to be kept inside.

Guys,

Think about it,

If a gal cry her heart out to u,

And all because of u,

Its time to look back on wat u have done,

Only u will know the answer to it.

Do consider it,

Coz one day,

It may be too late for regrets,

It may be too late to say "im sorry".

I do hope my message gets out there... Have a nice week ahead of you guys...

WORDS...

"Sometimes someone says something really small and it just fits into this empty place in your heart." Angela Chase My So-Called Life.

There's something powerful about words that people when they hear you say it might just inspires them or maybe sometimes might hurt them. I can say that all these years I've been in that situation in which I've said things to hurt a person. I am not perfect, I can make mistakes like any ordinary person would. My knowledge of things around me are never ending, it's like everyday I learn new things. There are somethings that are meant be heard and there are somethings that are not meant to be talked about. So if i have something bad to say to a person i'd rather shut up and shut the world around me. Some people doesn't understand but do try to. But there would come a time that I would just be bursting out my feelings that you would have to try to understand when the times come cause i just might have no explanation with you. I can not tell for the moment if i am making sense at all or not? So do bear with me since my thoughts has always been clattered.... I just can't avoid being like this since there are things in my life that doesn't really make sense or maybe they do I just don't see it at the moment. Words will be words so for those who just can't control themself whenever they are angry or mad just close your eyes and count from 1 to 10 and just breathe.... that might just do the trick.

SPECIAL SOMETHING

When something seem to feel right and it feels good you don't want that feeling to go. But what if for some reason you're in a complicated situation which obviously seems to follow me around... Lately i've been thinking what i have when it comes to relationship seems to be normal but then again it's not. A few people that i trusts knows the truth. It hurts to know the truth but i got to face it no matter what happens. Though at times i just don't understand it but everything happens for a reason. I try to decipher everything that is happening to me and i do try to think positively. Sometimes i just can't handle that everything is happening so fast nd yet i stay in this situation. The reality of it all is that I AM IN LOVE. There's a logical and good reason behind it yet i can't comprehend it for the moment....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

April 1 Friday morning woke up feeling good inside though i wasn't really looking forward for that day to come for some reason there was something missing in my life. I can't even explain it nor understand why i feel that way.So it was my birthday! Most of my friends remembered my birthday, some was trying to reach me but they can't some trouble with cellphones or whatever... Feeling just a little bit sad about stuffs in my life but hopefully things would be better for me. The best part of my birthday was having someone special in my life... Got to celebrate that day with my loved ones. Then there was that call this might change everything and it just might be a start of something good. (still crossing my fingers!!!!)

INVISIBLE IN YOUR EYES

Invisible Man

98 DEGREES

You can hardly
wait to tell all your friends
How his kisses taste sweet like wine
And how he always
makes your heart skip a beat
Every time he walks by
And if you're feeling down
He'll pick you up
He'll hold you close when
you're makin' love
He's everything
you've been dreaming of
Oh baby
I wish you'd look at me that way
Your beautiful eyes
lookin' deep into mine
Telling me more than
any words could say
But you don't even know I'm alive
Baby to you all I am
Is the invisible man
You probably spend
hours on the phone
Talkin' 'bout nothing at all
It doesn't matter
what the conversation
Just as long as he called
Lost in a love so real
And so sincere
You wipe away each other's tears
Your face lights up
whenever he appears
I see you all the time baby
The way you look at him
I wish it was me sweetheart
Boy I wish it was me
But I guess I'll never be...
[Chorus]

I just can't help myself everytime i hear this song it just makes me feel sad. I don't know if i'm still in that phase or i've already outgrown it (maybe...). It hurts to be in that position wherein you find yourself falling inlove with someone who won't love you back. Talking about past experiences yup i can certainly say that i am one of those people. It's like i'd do anything for that person but for some reason he doesn't even know i exist or maybe he does but all he can give me is the gift of friendship. I guess being rejected was mostly part of my life and being love seems to be so new to me like being reborn again. Everyone is so afraid of rejection but who doesn't? In my case i've gotten used to be second choice always the underdog. Maybe i'm putting myself down again but sometimes i couldn't help but feel this way especially if the person i love is the one making me feel this way. I know not everyone can understand this especially that special person. Sometimes everyone feels invisible and when they do no one can truly see what they feel inside, the pain and suffering of feeling rejected and alone. No one can truly understand how it feels like to be behind the scene of a movie and be unrecognized. No one wants to be aone in life and yet sometimes maybe it was meant to be. I guess people just get used to the fact of whatever or wherever they are in their life. The best thing to do is enjoy every minute of your life. The only person who can make you feel good is yourself and no one else can help you if you don't love yourself.

THEME SONG

TRUE
Ryan Cabrera

I wont talk
I wont breathe
I wont move till you finally see
That you belong with me

You might think
I don't look
But deep inside
In the corner of my mind
I'm attached to you
I'm weak
Its true
Cuz I'm afraid to know the answers
Do you want me too?
Cuz my heart keeps falling faster

Chorus
I've waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide
Its time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waiting
This is true

You don't know what you do
Everytime you walk into the room
I'm afraid to move
I'm weak
Its true
I'm just scared to know the ending
Do you see me too?
Do you even know u met me?

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide
Its time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited

This is true

I know when I go ill be on my way to you
The way that's true

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide
Its time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited

This is true

The themesong of my life for the moment. Dedicated to who else my boyfriend. He does not know this but i'm not afraid to tell people about it. For the first time in my life I know how it feels to be loved though as i've always observed it's still with a little complication. I try my best not to get involved with complications but it seems it wants to get attached with me for some unknown reasons. Guess no one is perfect after all, there might be an almost perfect relationship but that's just about it.... Nothing comes close to having THE PERFECT relationship. Everyone has its ups and downs as far as relationship goes. But mine has always been a special case but this time I know that deep down it's normal. As far as relationship goes this is REAL.....